...what i miss....

besides the obvious--family, friends, home...

there's a lot of things that i miss that i never really thought i would. you know everyday stuff that we all take for granted, but once we don't have it for awhile, then we miss it. so, anyway, what i've missed for the past 6 months--actual no doubt-about-it fresh air~grass~green grass~flowers~any kind of flowers~walking around my room/place of living in socks or barefoot and not having dirty feet~sleeping on a bigger than a twin bed~sleeping under actual sheets and not just some random blanket~actual food--homecooked meals or even fast food~being treated like a human~having a 1st name~not having to carry a rifle everywhere~not having to wear a uniform every solitary day~not having 11 (or more) roommates~not having to see the same people every solitary day~not having to hear someone cuss every 5 seconds~driving my own car around w/ the windows DOWN and not having to walk everywhere i go~not sweating 24/7~actual no crap white milk from an actual cow...not watery white stuff made to look like milk~alcohol (NO, i'm not alcoholic, i just miss it!)~guitar hero~my dogs and the kitty cat "attacking" me everytime i come home~showering in my own shower where a thousand or more haven't already showered~using my own bathroom where a thousand or more haven't already utilized it~being able to sit on the toilet knowing a thousand or more haven't already done so~running/walking outside and breathing normally b/c there's not all kinds of dust and big trucks/buses w/ bad exhausts around...

i'm sure there's many more, but my brain is just fried of thinking so much!
oh and if you haven't already heard...i will be on my way back to the states in T minus 17 days!!!!!!!! which should bring me back to the big mitten around the 1st of october!!!!

love you all.miss you all.see you all....REALLY SOON!!!!!
~stef

what is....

fresh air?? i ask this because i definitely have not smelled fresh air in a really long time. a few days ago, there was actual, no doubt about it fresh air here...for a couple days. it was really nice! it felt really weird, but it was still nice. it felt weird because out here in the middle of the desert we're used to constant dust/sand/windy/hotness...all day every day. it was definitely very nice to feel the random fresh air.
another thing that was really random...the other night when i was walking back to my room after work i heard birds singing/chirping. that was definitely very weird to hear out here in the middle of nowhere...but it was nice too!
so, anyway besides all the randomness...what else is going on in my wonderful life in afghanistan?? well, my best friend from boot camp is out here now, and i saw her for the 1st time since March the other day. it was so cool to see her again! it sucks that she's out here, but i'm glad i got to see her at least 1 time before i leave this wonderful place.
also, big news--just found out today! my cousin (kristi) and her husband (paul) recently returned from Ethiopia. they are currently in the process of adopting their daughter. they will return back to Ethiopia in about a week and return back to the states with her on August 23!! this means that when i come home, i will have a new cousin in the family! so exciting!!
i know that i may sound quite happy and upbeat in this post, but in reality i'm not really all that happy. other than my best friend being out here now, i have no one to talk to that i can actually trust. it's not good at all, because lately i've had quite a few not-so-good days and really needed someone to talk to. oh well. less than 2 months in this place and we're america bound! please keep the prayers a'comin though...they are definitely still needed. thanks for all that all of you have done already! it means so much!

love you.miss you.see you soon!
~stef

it's almost august!!

this is what it normally looks like here...very dusty!

this is an unusual clear day...they don't come around very often...

it is indeed almost august...and that it is a VERY good thing!! that means that i have less than 2 months left in this place...freakin awesome!! i'm so excited to come home, it's unbelievable! i honestly never thought i would miss greenery and flowers and such so much...but i do!! it's definitely better looking than all this sand! haha
so, aside from the excitement of almost being done, i still have some bad days. in fact, lately i've had more bad days than good. that's definitely not a good thing. i ask you to please keep the prayers coming...they are very much needed. thank you very much for all you have done so far...just keep it comin!! i'll be home soon, i promise!!

love you and miss you all,
~stef

p.s. check out the new pic! let me know what ya think!

1/2 way...

so i'm officially 1/2 way through my 1st deployment. so very exciting cuz i definitely cannot wait to come home. also, in 6 months i'll hit another 1/2 way point...1/2 way done w/ my 4 year contract! yeah!!
so...father's day is comin up and i'm so very sad that i have to be gone again for the 2nd year in a row. i'm sad that i have to be so far away from my dad on his special day, but i really hope he does have an awesome day...I LOVE YOU DAD!!
so, i'm sorry this is so short, but i could really use the positive thoughts and prayers right now. today and the past couple days haven't been that good for me, so please just pray that they'll get better. i'm tryin to stay and sound as positive as i can--especially in these posts, which is why i'm not writing very much right now--but sometimes it's just not that easy to stay so positive in such a stressful/negative environment. again, i'm sorry it's so short, but i just wanted to let y'all know that i'm stil alive and lookin forward to the end of summer!
peace,
~shupe-a-loop

earth.wind.fire.

...yep...that's been the topic of discussion for the past week and a half. why? because that's what we had here in Afghanistan on our supply lot. we had our earth which consists of mostly sand/dirt and rocks, lots and lots of wind, and a huge fire. followed by a huge sandstorm. what a great night. that's the pic on the left...nice contrast huh?? haha but anywho, that's why i have not posted in a long time. we lost everything, including our offices w/ our computers and everything else. not cool. we're all OK though--physically. most of us lost both military and personal stuff and are still kind of upset about that. but there's nothing we can do about that now...just gotta move on. we were moved onto our new lot and up and running w/in 4 days....not bad for losing everything if i must say! haha
so, anywho, besides the fire...been doin ok over here. the past couple of weeks have been pretty crazy. i've definitely have had some mixed feelings about this place and life in general, but i'm ok for now. my work shift has changed, i now work noon to midnight every day. i think i like this better. i have more to do work wise and i have more people to talk to and interact with. plus it's kinda nice i don't go to work at the same time everyone else does...kinda on my own program! haha well, i think that's all for now. i'll try not to have such a long break b/w posts again. sorry about that.

*also one more thing....due to the fact that my shift at work has changed, my duties have also. i'm asking for your prayers for me and my fellow Marines as I have to deal w/ the Afghan national people (actual Afghans) on a daily basis. please pray for our safety. thank you.

..joy is not the absence of trouble

..it is the presence of Christ. that was the main message this past Sunday at church. the sermon was about takin in what we have available to us. it may not all be the greatest [especially out here], but we just need to make the most of what we have and not dwell on what we don't have. i got a lot out of this sermon and i just wanted to share it w/ all of you...sorry it took a little bit for me to actually post it, but i eventually got around to it.
it has actually rained 3 times since i've been here. and by rain, i mean terential down pour and thunderstorms. it's actually pretty nice when it rains, b/c after the rain there's not near as much dust/sand blowin around. and the air is fresh. reminds me of home. i honestly never thought it would rain here while we are here, but it has and it's awesome. kinda lessens the heat just a little bit.
work has been slow and boring as usual, but i make it through. i find random things to keep me busy and try to keep me awake. lots and lots of caffeine and sugar is definitely involved! well, looks like i got some actual work to do right now, so until next time...peace!
~stef

*update* since i have a lot of free time out here, i'm gonna work on gettin started w/ online courses. hopefully in medical assistant or criminal justice...or both! wish me luck!

hit a little too close to home....

i know, i know, i know...2 posts in 1 week, what a shocker! i just feel like this one is absolutely necessary. today when i got home from work, one of my roommates told me that one of our other roommates was going home for a few days. when i asked why, she told me that her step-mother had passed away. that made me really sad. not just cause she had lost her step-mom, but cause if i had lost my step-mom or anyone close to me for that matter, and especially if i was out here, i would be an absolute wreck. it really hit close to home cause i have a step-mom, and i love her and miss her so much. i honestly don't know what i would do without her in my life...pretty sure i would go crazy. yeah, she's my "step-mom", but she's also my friend. it's kinda weird that she's only 10 years older than me, so the step-mom title, is just that....but it's ok, cause it's like a step-mom/friend/sister all rolled into one. pretty sweet if you ask me. the loss of one of my roommates family members also hit really close to home cause she is from michigan. i did not know this until today. what a way to find out huh? actually, the way i find out was...she was packing some clothes and things to take home and she pulled out a michigan shirt. so, i of course said "nice shirt, actually, love the shirt", which she then asked if i was from michigan, and then of course we got to talkin about how crazy michigan is. she's from the bay city area. if any of you wouldn't mind please send some prayers up for her and her family. i'm sure they could use them. please pray for safe travels for her [to and from this wonderful place], and also for healing during this tough time. i can't even begin to imagine what she is going through right now. like i said, i would be an absolute wreck, especially if i was unable to go home and be with my family.
so, anywho, i'm sorry this post isn't all that happy and cheerful, but it's just been not so good of a day. it's one of those days where i want to crawl into a hole and just chill there for awhile...and maybe...no definitely cry a little...a lot. right now, i feel like anything could set me off into a whole lot of waterworks. i don't want to cry here cause it's not "marine like" to do such a thing. but if i can't help it, i can't help it. i can't wait for sunday to get here. i have a feeling church will make me happy again. so, i guess please continue to pray for me. pray that the rest of my time here will go as well as can be expected. pray that i won't go crazy and somehow manage to stay sane. and also, pray for all the troops out here, that we will ALL make it home safe and soon.
thank you from myself and all the troops out here. it really means a lot.

until next time,
~stef

p.s. let me just point out that this post may be a lot about my step-mom, but that's not because i love her more than my mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, sister, brother, cousin, friend, whatever...it's because my roommate lost her step-mom, so that got me thinking about my own step-mom. trust me, i love you all and i don't know what i would do without any of you!