...what i miss....

besides the obvious--family, friends, home...

there's a lot of things that i miss that i never really thought i would. you know everyday stuff that we all take for granted, but once we don't have it for awhile, then we miss it. so, anyway, what i've missed for the past 6 months--actual no doubt-about-it fresh air~grass~green grass~flowers~any kind of flowers~walking around my room/place of living in socks or barefoot and not having dirty feet~sleeping on a bigger than a twin bed~sleeping under actual sheets and not just some random blanket~actual food--homecooked meals or even fast food~being treated like a human~having a 1st name~not having to carry a rifle everywhere~not having to wear a uniform every solitary day~not having 11 (or more) roommates~not having to see the same people every solitary day~not having to hear someone cuss every 5 seconds~driving my own car around w/ the windows DOWN and not having to walk everywhere i go~not sweating 24/7~actual no crap white milk from an actual cow...not watery white stuff made to look like milk~alcohol (NO, i'm not alcoholic, i just miss it!)~guitar hero~my dogs and the kitty cat "attacking" me everytime i come home~showering in my own shower where a thousand or more haven't already showered~using my own bathroom where a thousand or more haven't already utilized it~being able to sit on the toilet knowing a thousand or more haven't already done so~running/walking outside and breathing normally b/c there's not all kinds of dust and big trucks/buses w/ bad exhausts around...

i'm sure there's many more, but my brain is just fried of thinking so much!
oh and if you haven't already heard...i will be on my way back to the states in T minus 17 days!!!!!!!! which should bring me back to the big mitten around the 1st of october!!!!

love you all.miss you all.see you all....REALLY SOON!!!!!
~stef

what is....

fresh air?? i ask this because i definitely have not smelled fresh air in a really long time. a few days ago, there was actual, no doubt about it fresh air here...for a couple days. it was really nice! it felt really weird, but it was still nice. it felt weird because out here in the middle of the desert we're used to constant dust/sand/windy/hotness...all day every day. it was definitely very nice to feel the random fresh air.
another thing that was really random...the other night when i was walking back to my room after work i heard birds singing/chirping. that was definitely very weird to hear out here in the middle of nowhere...but it was nice too!
so, anyway besides all the randomness...what else is going on in my wonderful life in afghanistan?? well, my best friend from boot camp is out here now, and i saw her for the 1st time since March the other day. it was so cool to see her again! it sucks that she's out here, but i'm glad i got to see her at least 1 time before i leave this wonderful place.
also, big news--just found out today! my cousin (kristi) and her husband (paul) recently returned from Ethiopia. they are currently in the process of adopting their daughter. they will return back to Ethiopia in about a week and return back to the states with her on August 23!! this means that when i come home, i will have a new cousin in the family! so exciting!!
i know that i may sound quite happy and upbeat in this post, but in reality i'm not really all that happy. other than my best friend being out here now, i have no one to talk to that i can actually trust. it's not good at all, because lately i've had quite a few not-so-good days and really needed someone to talk to. oh well. less than 2 months in this place and we're america bound! please keep the prayers a'comin though...they are definitely still needed. thanks for all that all of you have done already! it means so much!

love you.miss you.see you soon!
~stef

it's almost august!!

this is what it normally looks like here...very dusty!

this is an unusual clear day...they don't come around very often...

it is indeed almost august...and that it is a VERY good thing!! that means that i have less than 2 months left in this place...freakin awesome!! i'm so excited to come home, it's unbelievable! i honestly never thought i would miss greenery and flowers and such so much...but i do!! it's definitely better looking than all this sand! haha
so, aside from the excitement of almost being done, i still have some bad days. in fact, lately i've had more bad days than good. that's definitely not a good thing. i ask you to please keep the prayers coming...they are very much needed. thank you very much for all you have done so far...just keep it comin!! i'll be home soon, i promise!!

love you and miss you all,
~stef

p.s. check out the new pic! let me know what ya think!

1/2 way...

so i'm officially 1/2 way through my 1st deployment. so very exciting cuz i definitely cannot wait to come home. also, in 6 months i'll hit another 1/2 way point...1/2 way done w/ my 4 year contract! yeah!!
so...father's day is comin up and i'm so very sad that i have to be gone again for the 2nd year in a row. i'm sad that i have to be so far away from my dad on his special day, but i really hope he does have an awesome day...I LOVE YOU DAD!!
so, i'm sorry this is so short, but i could really use the positive thoughts and prayers right now. today and the past couple days haven't been that good for me, so please just pray that they'll get better. i'm tryin to stay and sound as positive as i can--especially in these posts, which is why i'm not writing very much right now--but sometimes it's just not that easy to stay so positive in such a stressful/negative environment. again, i'm sorry it's so short, but i just wanted to let y'all know that i'm stil alive and lookin forward to the end of summer!
peace,
~shupe-a-loop

earth.wind.fire.

...yep...that's been the topic of discussion for the past week and a half. why? because that's what we had here in Afghanistan on our supply lot. we had our earth which consists of mostly sand/dirt and rocks, lots and lots of wind, and a huge fire. followed by a huge sandstorm. what a great night. that's the pic on the left...nice contrast huh?? haha but anywho, that's why i have not posted in a long time. we lost everything, including our offices w/ our computers and everything else. not cool. we're all OK though--physically. most of us lost both military and personal stuff and are still kind of upset about that. but there's nothing we can do about that now...just gotta move on. we were moved onto our new lot and up and running w/in 4 days....not bad for losing everything if i must say! haha
so, anywho, besides the fire...been doin ok over here. the past couple of weeks have been pretty crazy. i've definitely have had some mixed feelings about this place and life in general, but i'm ok for now. my work shift has changed, i now work noon to midnight every day. i think i like this better. i have more to do work wise and i have more people to talk to and interact with. plus it's kinda nice i don't go to work at the same time everyone else does...kinda on my own program! haha well, i think that's all for now. i'll try not to have such a long break b/w posts again. sorry about that.

*also one more thing....due to the fact that my shift at work has changed, my duties have also. i'm asking for your prayers for me and my fellow Marines as I have to deal w/ the Afghan national people (actual Afghans) on a daily basis. please pray for our safety. thank you.

..joy is not the absence of trouble

..it is the presence of Christ. that was the main message this past Sunday at church. the sermon was about takin in what we have available to us. it may not all be the greatest [especially out here], but we just need to make the most of what we have and not dwell on what we don't have. i got a lot out of this sermon and i just wanted to share it w/ all of you...sorry it took a little bit for me to actually post it, but i eventually got around to it.
it has actually rained 3 times since i've been here. and by rain, i mean terential down pour and thunderstorms. it's actually pretty nice when it rains, b/c after the rain there's not near as much dust/sand blowin around. and the air is fresh. reminds me of home. i honestly never thought it would rain here while we are here, but it has and it's awesome. kinda lessens the heat just a little bit.
work has been slow and boring as usual, but i make it through. i find random things to keep me busy and try to keep me awake. lots and lots of caffeine and sugar is definitely involved! well, looks like i got some actual work to do right now, so until next time...peace!
~stef

*update* since i have a lot of free time out here, i'm gonna work on gettin started w/ online courses. hopefully in medical assistant or criminal justice...or both! wish me luck!

hit a little too close to home....

i know, i know, i know...2 posts in 1 week, what a shocker! i just feel like this one is absolutely necessary. today when i got home from work, one of my roommates told me that one of our other roommates was going home for a few days. when i asked why, she told me that her step-mother had passed away. that made me really sad. not just cause she had lost her step-mom, but cause if i had lost my step-mom or anyone close to me for that matter, and especially if i was out here, i would be an absolute wreck. it really hit close to home cause i have a step-mom, and i love her and miss her so much. i honestly don't know what i would do without her in my life...pretty sure i would go crazy. yeah, she's my "step-mom", but she's also my friend. it's kinda weird that she's only 10 years older than me, so the step-mom title, is just that....but it's ok, cause it's like a step-mom/friend/sister all rolled into one. pretty sweet if you ask me. the loss of one of my roommates family members also hit really close to home cause she is from michigan. i did not know this until today. what a way to find out huh? actually, the way i find out was...she was packing some clothes and things to take home and she pulled out a michigan shirt. so, i of course said "nice shirt, actually, love the shirt", which she then asked if i was from michigan, and then of course we got to talkin about how crazy michigan is. she's from the bay city area. if any of you wouldn't mind please send some prayers up for her and her family. i'm sure they could use them. please pray for safe travels for her [to and from this wonderful place], and also for healing during this tough time. i can't even begin to imagine what she is going through right now. like i said, i would be an absolute wreck, especially if i was unable to go home and be with my family.
so, anywho, i'm sorry this post isn't all that happy and cheerful, but it's just been not so good of a day. it's one of those days where i want to crawl into a hole and just chill there for awhile...and maybe...no definitely cry a little...a lot. right now, i feel like anything could set me off into a whole lot of waterworks. i don't want to cry here cause it's not "marine like" to do such a thing. but if i can't help it, i can't help it. i can't wait for sunday to get here. i have a feeling church will make me happy again. so, i guess please continue to pray for me. pray that the rest of my time here will go as well as can be expected. pray that i won't go crazy and somehow manage to stay sane. and also, pray for all the troops out here, that we will ALL make it home safe and soon.
thank you from myself and all the troops out here. it really means a lot.

until next time,
~stef

p.s. let me just point out that this post may be a lot about my step-mom, but that's not because i love her more than my mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, sister, brother, cousin, friend, whatever...it's because my roommate lost her step-mom, so that got me thinking about my own step-mom. trust me, i love you all and i don't know what i would do without any of you!

i sleep in an actual bed!

So, I’m sittin here, another day at work. Still bored outta my mind, tryin to think of somethin to write for this blog update. I’m sorry that I don’t have an update everyday or even every couple days, but everyday out here is the same for me, so I really don’t know what to say all the time, but I’ll come up w/ something, I promise! I work the night shift here in my own little office w/ pretty much no one around, so I got plenty of time to think. Not sure if that’s a good thing yet or not?? After workin this same shift for the past month, I am still not used to it. no matter how much sleep I get during the day, I’m still tired as all get out at night when I’m working. Right now, typing this, is helping me stay awake….as well as my 16 oz coffee! J soon I will be goin outside to the gym that we have right here at the office and workin out for about a hour. That also helps me stay awake…at least for a little bit. I’m already losin weight, so don’t be too surprised if I’m a lot smaller than I was the last time you saw me. I can’t gain weight though, cuz if I do make it home in time, I gotta fit into my dress for the wedding. And if that doesn’t fit then we got a big problem!! Haha oh! Big news from the last update….i got an actual bed now that I sleep on!! I mean, I slept on a mattress before, but it was on the floor, but 4 girls moved out of the room to somewhere else, so now I get a bed! It’s amazing!! I went to church yesterday (Sunday the 18th of April) for the 1st time since I’ve been here and also the 1st time since I went back at home. It was amazing….i had goosebumps pretty much the whole time, and my eyes were all teary eyed when singing the songs. I loved it and I can’t wait to go back next week. It’ll be something to look forward to every week and help make the time go by faster. Also, the chaplain told us a background story about himself…he was born in Minnesota but raised in Detroit, MI….and the best part….went to the University of Michigan before he joined the Navy!! GO BLUE!!! I just thought it was really cool to meet someone else out here from Michigan who is also a Michigan fan. Makes me look forward to football season even more!! Haha
As I was walkin back to my room yesterday after work and church I got to thinking (and, yes, it did hurt a little)…I am actually in Afghanistan. It kinda just hit me….i know a month later, but still. It’s just hard to believe, that 5 years ago if you had asked me if I would ever join the military and go to Afghanistan, I probably would’ve looked at you like you were crazy. And, now look at me. This is just so unbelievable. I usually have to remind myself everyday where I am and what I’m here for. Of course I’m here cuz they pretty much told me I didn’t have a choice, but more importantly, I’m here for my family, friends, and my country. I chose to do this, and I’ll do it proudly…even if it sucks most of the time. I will have lots of stories when I come back and will be able to laugh about a lot of this later on in life.
I also just discovered that I can do all this [blog updating business] from my work computer, so I'm pretty excited about that! :)
I'll be back soon, I promise!!!
Love you all and miss you all!!

C-130 rollin down the strip....

So…been in afghan about 2 weeks now and I’m still alive! Sometimes it feels like we just got here and other times it feel s like we’ve been here for awhile.
The flight over here on the C-130 was definitely a 1st for me, and definitely very interesting. It’s fairly cramped inside, not a lot of room to move around, and like the most difficult seat belts ever on the face of the earth. Oh well, it’s all good. It’s very loud—need hearing protection or headphones in when flying. Got some good sleep on those flights though, slept the whole way=AMAZING!! The landing was probably the best part cuz we spiraled down. It felt like a roller coaster…I even “lost my stomach” a couple times. Loved it!!
So, since I’ve gotten here, I now have 15 roommates in one very small room…yes, you are reading that correctly, there are 16 of us in one room. 12 sleep on actual bunk beds, and 4 sleep on mattresses on the floor. Conveniently, I am one of the 4. It’s not too much fun, but we make the best of it. Thankfully, ½ of us are on day shift and ½ on night shift. That way, not all of us are in the room at the same time anymore. I am on night shift, so basically my life now consists of sleeping, working, eating occasionally, and….yeah that’s about it. I thought I had no life before, I really have no life now. Haha
This place is all desert, kinda like 29 Palms, CA…spent a total of 6 weeks there, I know it well. Really the only thing missing here is mountains…well, actually, there are some mountains here, we just don’t get to see them often b/c it’s so dusty. It’s like a constant layer of fog that permits you of seeing longer than a mile away. And when there’s dust storms, those definitely don’t help the visibility either….and they hurt the eyes! They’re kinda like a blizzard, but w/ sand/dust instead of snow. The weather is fairly warm right now, usually w/ what I think are blue skies (dust) and sunshine. I think we’ve had probably less than 5 cloudy days since we’ve been here. It hasn’t rained yet, and it probably won’t until after we leave. We’re here for the hot/dry season.
So, to sum it all up, I’ve been doin ok. As usual, some days are harder than others, but that’s expected, especially out here. The 1st time I got to call home from here, I was so excited/shocked that the person on the other end actually answered (it was like 3 a.m.), that I really didn’t know what to say. It brought tears to my eyes when I heard their voice for the 1st time in about a week. I love to call home, and I do so as much as possible. I also love to get emails from home, some which include pictures…those also bring tears to my eyes. As I’ve said before like a million times and I’ll probably say another million times, thank you so much to everyone reading this for all the continued prayers, love, encouragement, and support. It really, truly does mean a lot to me and helps me to get through each and every day knowing I have such a big support system back home.
Oh yeah, and they do serve caffeine (mountain dew, energy drinks, coffee, etc) here!! And believe me…it is delicious!! J Also, to all my Michigan fan friends and family, my motivation on hikes or even while running is singing “Hail to the Victors” to myself….over and over again. It really does help!! :)

Thank you and love you all!!!

~stef

p.s. please feel free to post your comments! i would love to know what y'all think about all this. :)

the beginning

so, this is my 1st post on this blog of my 1st deployment. we left cali on friday, march 19, 2010. we arrived to kyrgyzstan (Manas AB) on sunday, march 21, 2010.
things are goin pretty good so far. the flights seemed to take for forever, but it was still good. my nice boney butt hurt quite a bit after the long flights. haha we were treated like royalty though and that was pretty sweet. they fed us like constantly...definately did not go hungry. we each had our own monitor in the headrest in front of us. we could watch whatever we wanted and how ever many we wanted for free. pretty sweet!! lets just say i watched like 5 or 6 movies! haha kinda kept the boredom level down too. they also gave us each a blanket and a pillow, which some of us kept. :)
it was really cool to be in germany. 1st time that i had been over the atlantic, so i was pretty excited. sadly, we didn't get to see much of the country cuz we just chilled in the terminal. but we did have to ride a bus from the plane to the terminal, which was about a 15 minute ride, so we did see some of the country. saw some old buildings that looked like they were from WWII...seriously! that's about all we saw! haha
then we got to kyrgyzstan, and it's really no different than the states except there's some random stuff in different languages, but that's ok. we sleep in like a really big squad bay on bunk beds. the chow hall is pretty good so far. they have like 3 places to go to that have wi-fi, so that's pretty sweet. there's also pool tables, foosball, fitness center, px, etc. not bad for 3 days.

well, that's all for now. i will post again soon, hopefully w/ something a little more exciting!

~stef